Poem, 8/11

the way he drove up the driveway, slowly,

unannounced, windows open, summer’s day

out of a blue green era

i pulled my bike up

to his window, smiling

susan and i

(his girlfriend post divorce,

sitting in the passenger seat,

to whom he is lovingly still attached)

susan and i

have decided that we are having a child

to make up for the mistakes your mom and i made raising you

is not unlike earth

and the colonization of mars.


there is only one of everything.


susan was an inspiration. 

she too is in ruins. 

Welcome to San Francisco

I am frequently asked for recommendations and local knowledge about the city I live in and love. I’ve put it all in one place – just for you!


  • Walking up and down Valencia St in the Mission is fillllllled with stuff to eat and buy and see.

  • Coit Tower is pretty, and you can get a great view from the adjoining park without paying to go up in the tower. But! the green space directly to the east of it, between it and Embarcadero, is like being in The Shire in the middle of the city. Magic!

  • Dolores Park, 20th/Dolores, the southwest corner has the best free view of downtown.

  • If you go to Dolo, because yolo, it’s fun to grab an ice cream sandwich at Bi-Rite – for which you do not have to wait in line because they are pre-made and since nobody is scooping a thing for you, you can avoid the wait & get the treat in yo mouth sooner.

  • Inside Golden Gate Park is the de Young (beautiful building, amazing viewing spot that’s free to get into, pretty cool modern art), close to the California Academy of Sciences (arts, sciences, fish), and the Japanese Tea Garden are all pretty cool.

  • If you walk out that way, the strip on Haight close to GG Park has some fun spots: Parada 22 and The Alembic are great for drink and food), and Free Gold Watch (actually on Waller, about 24 retro pinball games and a few old school arcade games).


Not fancy

  • Serrano’s Pizza in the Mission, 21/Lexington, is pretty amazing. They make each slice custom for you. Bigger than your average. I’m a fan of the Valencia.

  • Mau on Valencia is delish and affordable Vietnamese. Get the fried pork rolls with lettuce wraps, Cha Giao or similar. It could be a meal

  • Mama Ji’s in the Castro is dim sum and delicious and you can sit outside

  • El Metate has the best burrito in the mission, on 22/Bryant. Don’t come for me, bro, with any other place. They win on price, size, quality, and distribution of ingredients. Seriously, it’s not just a whole bite of beans and then a whole bite of vegetables. Oh, and get the vegetarian burrito – now with real vegetables!

  • Southern Pacific Brewing on 19/Treat. Lots of their beers, some other folks’ beers, pretty good grub. Recommend the garlic fries with any meal.

  • Crafty Fox, 13/Mission, another nice brewpub with a wide variety of taps, and a truly truly excellent fried chicken sando. Less excellent if it’s busy, though.

  • Tacolicious on 18/Valencia has pretty great cocktails and slightly pricey tacos, but the bottomless chips + salsa almost makes it worth it

  • Humphry Slocombe - very good, local, quirky & amazing flavors

  • Mitchell’s for ice cream. Especially the pistachio. Some crazy-ass flavors.

A little bit fancy

  • If you’re feeling a touch upscale, Starbelly is fun and has great cocktails and pizza and pasta. Plus a little patio in the back.

  • Tartine Bakery. For everything. An institution.

  • Kahnfections. If you don’t want to wait in line at Tartine and still want some quality baked goods.

  • Stable Café on 17/Folsom. Cool little joint, amazingly beautiful outdoor space.

  • Frog Hollow Farm Café in the Embarcadero Ferry Building has a risotto tartlet made with mascarpone, organic currant, and orange peel. That is all.

  • Mission Cheese – Wine! With cheese and snacks!

  • Beretta – Delicious modern italian in a lively setting

  • Bar Agricole – amazing cocktails, amazing environment, amazing food.


  • Heirloom Café is a delightful, delicious, comfortably upscale spot in the Mission that also has a terrific wine list. Their prix fixe with wine pairings is worth every dollar.

  • La Ciccia is the best Italian food in San Francisco. Be prepared to dine at an odd hour if you’re looking for reservations close to the day you’d like to experience it.

  • Central Kitchen – One of the most delicious places in the city, very upscale, beautiful, minimal, lots of smaller & medium plates with amazing nuance & variety


  • Atlas Café – great cafe with indoor & outdoor seating and a wide menu, plus free wifi (you have to renew it every few hours)

  • Coffee Bar – I know, I know, silly name. But if all coffee bars were like this one, you’d agree! Free wifi, delicious food, amazing indoor & outdoor setting

  • Haus – a minimal, quiet coffeeshop with a few pastries, great coffee, and beautiful yard

Getting around

  • Getaround – here’s $20 credit to use local cars owned by local people. Best for by the hour or a day. You need to tank the car up and pay for it before you return it.

  • Turo – here’s $25 credit to use local cars owned by local people. Best for the day or week. You need to tank the car up and pay for it before you return it.

  • Zipcar – local cars owned by a non-local business – but first to the market. They pay for the gas. Competitive pricing with the above two, once you compare multi-day.

  • Ford GoBike – ad-hoc bike by the hour, or by the day. Even better for those hills if you can get an electric bike. Don’t forget to turn it on!

What Actually Works

I’ve always been a fan of Milton Glaser’s maxim:

The solution to the problem is contained within the problem.

So when I saw on Twitter that Nathan Banshaw was starting a podcast and needed a name, I reflected back to him what I saw as the core of what they were talking about.

And, boom: they decided to call it What Actually Works.

Now, naming is hard. It’s rarely this easy. But this is a nice example of what decision-making can do in small teams.

Selling the story of your work

This is a story about creation.

This story is about your story. The story of the work you’ve been doing. The work you’re probably doing right now. And how to make that story clear and compelling, with a course of action.

I once took a public speaking class. It was my freshman year of college. In it, the teacher posited a simple framework: tell them what you’re going to tell them. Then, tell them. Finally, tell them what you’ve already told them.

Seems pretty easy, right? A simple way to embed a story within a story, maybe even to bulk up your own story.

But it’s totally wrong.

Nobody wants to be told, told again, then re-told. That’s literally being given a talking to – and lectures are rarely engaging. They are, by definition, one-way.

The way to establish an engaging story is to consider it selling.

Selling is not an inappropriate word in the context of design work. Even a design that is brilliant, timely, and original still needs to be contextualized with a little persuasion, a bit of unpacking about design decisions you made inside your head – in other words, selling. 

That public speaking professor was wrong, at least when it comes to design. Telling is not what you want to do. Telling is about you; selling is about the customer.

Telling is about features of your product or service – e.g., the fastest car, the best check-out flow. Telling is a bit cold and impersonal, and can sometimes differ based on who is doing the telling. When you tell a telling story, you are simply listing the facts.

By contrast, selling is about the benefits that your product or service conveys to the customer – e.g., the fastest car that helps you arrive safely in record time; the best check-out flow to make your purchase experience effortless.

Your customer will buy your product and sign up for your service based on what it does for them. They have a need, and you are suggesting that you can fulfill it. And once you capture their attention and interest – the promise of a better future, solved by you! – you will be able to establish trust.

And how do you do that? Start with why.

Why are you making this product or service? What motivates you to do this work? In what ways are you the perfect person to be solving this problem, fulfilling this need? This is a critical step that establishes your credibility, and requires you to be a bit vulnerable – especially since you will likely be in an environment focused around you and your content. Once you establish this credibility, though, it can be the basis for a wonderful, engaging story.

Here are seven elements of selling a successful story about your design:

  1. Start with why. It’s your central premise for doing this work. The passion you have about why you are doing this work conveys your credibility to solve this problem.

  2. Use clear, simple language that is easy to understand by anyone, with any job function – not just designers talking about design, or engineers talking with other engineers.

  3. Establish a great cadence of delivery. Speak at a comfortable pace – not too quickly, nor too slowly. And take breaths. The moment you pause, even for just one beat, you will (re)capture the room’s attention. Your body will thank you.

  4. Rehearse. Know your content, how it corresponds with your visuals, and practice selling the story over and over. You will want to rehearse so many times that you make it look easy.

  5. Sweep the room when you speak. Be inclusive, and make eye contact with everyone present. Don’t focus solely on the key decision-maker, your teachers, or your client; great input comes from everywhere.

  6. Be specific about what you want from the storytelling – is there an action to take or a decision to make? Is it due by a certain date? Would you like feedback on the whole thing, or a specific component? Knowing what you want out of the it before you go into it can influence the order of the narrative, or encourage you to highlight key points for a particular audience.

  7. Enjoy it. Smile. This is your opportunity to share all the great work you've done and get feedback about it — which will ultimately improve your product, service, story, and storytelling ability. It gets easier to sell a story the more you do it.

And here are seven elements, highly tongue-in-cheekily described, of what not to do:

  1. Be bored and passionless, since you’ve sold this story a hundred times before. You’re not excited about it, so you don’t expect us to be. Yawn.

  2. Be inconsistent in your slide design. Mock-ups that jump and jitter are your specialty. Pixel perfection? Never heard of it.

  3. Bristle at feedback. Nah, it’s cool – I don’t want to learn from your expertise, thanks anyway.

  4. Use a quiet speaking voice, especially in a big space.

  5. Hide behind the podium / teleprompter / your notes.

  6. Use exclusionary words, such as obviously, so on and so forth, of course, and et cetera. Of these, “of course” is your favorite – what’s obvious to you is totally obvious to everyone else, right?

  7. Use effects to distract us, since there are so many awesome slide transitions built in.

So now that you know the difference between telling & selling, and elements of how to sell and not sell your story, let’s look at how to create that story!

My Jewish mother loves to make her mother’s matzoh ball soup recipe. Except that nearly every time she makes it, she’s prepared to throw the first batch of matzoh balls away. Why? Matzoh balls are a challenging mix of ingredients, and a successful outcome is subject to many variables – the heat of the pan, the ratio of cooking oil or fat, the quality and freshness of the matzoh meal, how long they are refrigerated for before being fried up. So many little things to consider, and adjust along the way.

Similarly, the creation process can be messy. You may have scrapped ideas, many idle or unproductive hours, and many more hours pursuing iteration upon iteration.

Document it. All of it.

Capture the beginning messy part of the process – and every subsequent part. Take photos, make notes. Step back from your work at a regular cadence – daily, weekly. By the time you are ready to sell the story you have been creating, you will want this content to look back upon, edit through, and coalesce. It shows where you’ve come from, the journey you’ve taken, the ideas and paths you pursued – and didn’t. Documenting your process provides more ingredients than you need to ensure the end product comes out deliciously.

So then: here are ten steps to creating a successful story:

  1. Hello / intro / what we’re here for – start with the basics and set our expectations, particularly how long you are going to be talking, if there’s a Q&A at the end, or if you prefer to answer questions along the way

  2. Why: the current status, how we have been living, how the situation got this way

  3. Opportunity: why is this unsatisfactory, sub-optimal, bad or wrong, broken. Set us up to think: how could we have we been living this way?!

  4. What: what’s the big idea? What will life be like in this new, more ideal future state?

  5. Who: I’m doing something about it, I’m qualified / my team’s qualified because…

  6. How: How will it work, in stages, over time? What’s the plan (for now)?

  7. Where: What was your journey like to get here? What pivots and a-ha moments did you have along the way? And what will it take to get to this new future state? Funding, advice, or simply more feedback? 

  8. Specifics: What are its benefits? What are the drawbacks?

  9. Now: what’s the call to action?

  10. And finally, my favorite: What question haven’t I asked that you’d like to talk about? This last point is an incredibly powerful way to open up questions, and get answers to important points that the audience may have been holding back on.

Many thanks to Simon Sinek and Barry Nalebuff for inspiration.

Ribbon Bed v1

Many years ago, for a bed design I created, I commissioned a sketch from an industrial designer and RISD grad Erik Askin. I told him of my inspirations and guiding principles, and he made some great suggestions about its structural integrity.

Cut to many years later when I found Green Piece Furniture, on Treasure Island, to work with me on its manufacture. The founder, Nick, developed a schematic drawing based on Erik's sketch. I visited his workshop a few times to see the work in progress, and to document the process of molding the plywood and adding the walnut veneer. 

Now that I have been sleeping on the v1 prototype since Summer 2016, and enjoy its smooth lines, I already have ideas about the v2... I’d be delighted to talk with a wholesaler about mass manufacture, wink.

The sketch.

The sketch.

The schematic.

The schematic.

One side of the mold.

One side of the mold.

So I think my floors are walnut, too…

So I think my floors are walnut, too…

Time with family

On a breezy summer August evening In Manhattan, walking around Tudor Park with my Mom, a serious thought suddenly stopped her from walking.

“I’ve never seen a Tweet,” she said.

So I stopped too, and pulled out my phone to show her. “This is what it looks like on this device. It looks different on other devices — your phone, someone else’s phone, and on the web.” 

We sat in a small and beautiful public park in an area of the city I’d never seen, and I conveyed, using simple terms, the differences between Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook (where she is a user). I made it relatable: “If Gucci has 10 million followers on Instagram, how might they use Instagram to share…”

“The fall looks!” she erupted, catching on. “There goes catalogs.” 

The next morning, I received an email entirely written in the subject line: 

hi. trip home was uneventful. what a pleasure living here! 2 seconds to the train, taxis are available all nite long. very civilized. tonite was delightful, and i thank you again for a yummy dinner and great conversation. i really do hope you enjoy this coming weekend. please make sure to kiss jordan and the butchkalas for me and tell them how much i love them and miss them. safe drive down and back. looked up gazpacho recipe which i haven’t made in years and forgot how easy and appropriate it is for the summer. thanks for the suggestion. mommy wuvs you. xoxo

Small steps.

Today my Dad and I drove from New York to Washington, DC. About five hours of drive time, on a circuitous route he preferred, avoiding all major highways and cities between the two metropolitan areas. (I met him in Irvington and we took 287  > 78 > lunch at a Jamaican place in Harrisburg > 15 > 270, if you’re curious.)

Along the route, I saw only three signs I should have stopped to photograph.

A few times he pointed, slowly, gesturally, with his right hand, as if controlled like a marionette of childhood desire. Occasionally these gestures were accompanied by exhortation: “Dairy Queen!” — pronounced with just enough time to slow down without accident as the driver of his Subaru. And occasionally these gestures were silent. 

We stopped at a farm on route 15 that had great signage — great enough to entice us off the main road. Every few hundred feet there were serial messages attached to rusty bikes, leaning against miles of corn. So we bought corn, a dozen heirloom tomatoes all of the same size (lasagna on the menu tomorrow night), and sadly, too few deliciously drippy peaches. 

We talked about hip hop vs rap, and I played him a bit of Groove Theory and then a bit of Tribe. We left this particular inquiry at: “Is there any rap that’s more Barbara Streisandy…?”

We talked about newspapers vs newsfeeds. Where the news gets the news (hint: it’s Twitter). He refers to everything handheld as a “gizmo.” Even: “Is there a gizmo on that... gizmo that can tell me how the market did today?” The retired stockbroker, still checking in. I fetched it from the soon-to-be-deleteable apps I keep in a folder called Crapple. 

The most engaging of topics happened after lunch when he asked, during a long stretch of big puffy billowy cumulus clouds, if I thought that all our memories are stored in our brains somewhere. 

“Hm,” I said aloud. “Great question… Yes, I do think all experiences are stored.”


“Well, if you think about it, DNA has four times the computing power of the ones and zeroes that power computers.”

“Ya lost me.”

“Think of it this way: if you were cooking with just salt and pepper, you’d have limited range. Although you can do a lot with it, it’s still just two options. But instead if you had access to parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme… you’d have a different order of magnitude.”